literature

Brian encounters Mating Season

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Literature Text

It started like this….

Brian: So Wop…I heard about your little "night outs" you have with random women. Damn man, have you no self-control?

Wopter scratches his head until he realized what Brian was talking about.

Wopter: Oh that! Well it's not my fault man. It was mating season for me. Just following my instincts.

Brian's glare became an unimpressed glare when he heard Wopter say this.

Brian: Oh yeah sure…blame a non-existing thing for your sex addiction. Dude, just admit that you are addicted to the pleasure of making love to people.

Wopter: I'm serious man! It's because of mating season! It's a common thing we rabbits go through. In fact, you're a rabbit yourself and pretty soon, it'll happen to you.

Brian: Pffft. Riiiiiiiight.

Wopter: I'm telling you Brian, it'll happen.

Brian: Look Wop, I may be part rabbit, but there's no way I'm gonna let something like that happen to me. I can assure you, I will be totally fi-

Suddenly, Brian's ears perked in the air. He started hunching up as if someone just kicked him in the crotch. He started doing strange movements.

Brian: ?! Mmmmm! Arrrrfggg!! Ffffffff!!!

Wopter: ? Uuuuh. You alright?

Brian: I don't know! What is…What is this strange vibe getting in my nether regions!?

Wopter pondered for a moment until he found the solution.

Wopter: A-ha! Your day has come Brian. Your starting to get MAJOR urges.

Brian: Huh?

Wopter: Ugh…your horny dude

Brian: WHAT?!  Bu..Bu…but I can't have that feeling!!!!!

Wopter: Well sorry dude, it's a one of the things that happens to us males. When we feel that way, it means we want to mate.

Brian: No way! I thought mating season was just a myth!

Wopter: *raises eyebrow* Wait you thought mating season was a myth?!

Brian: Trust me Wop, if you lived in my world, you'd understand.

Wopter: oh…

Brian: How do I make this feeling go away?!

Wopter: You'd have to mate with someone man. It's what mating season is all about.

Brian: Wopter you know damn well I can't do that!

Wopter: Give me one good reason why you can't?

Brian: Well for one, I don't want to cheat on my girlfriend!

Wopter: Well then if you don't want to cheat on her, mate with her then.

Brian:…you know if I wasn't doing these staggering movements, I'd smack you for even making that suggestion.

Wopter: What's wrong with mating with your girlfriend?

Brian: A, we promised each other we'd do it when we are ready and this here is NOT what I had in mind. And B……….I can't think of a B now, but It can assure, it'll back up my answer. So in short, its out of the question!

Wopter:  Well sorry dude, but its either that or your body is gonna force you to mate with someone.

Brian: DX Why did this happen to me?! Isn't there another way?!

Wopter thinks to himself, pondering ideas on how to rid Brian of the vibes, until he figures it out.

Wopter:…weeeeel…..there is one way.

Brian immediately grabbed Wopter's shoulders and began shaking him violently, wanting the answer.

Brian: What way?! WHAT WAY?! TELL ME!!!

Wopter: Ok! Ok! Calm yourself! Ok, another way to get that vibe out of you is to watch something so sick….so vile…so disgusting……so gut wrenchingly awful, that your mating genes will be neutralized for a year.

Brian: Hmmm…that does sound good…but the only thing that repulsive is-

Before Brian could finish, his eyes widened. He clearly figured out what it was that Wopter was talking about.

Brian: No…..you don't think O_O

Wopter: Yep…..your gonna have to watch…………*eyes squinted* 2 Girls and a Cup

Brian's face latterly turned pale at the thought, but with a sigh, he accepted the fate.

Brian: If this will keep me from doing something I'm going to regret for all eternity….I'll do it….

Wopter: *pats Brian's shoulder* Good luck man…

Brian nods and walks off, to do the unthinkable. And so, 3 hours have passed. Brian came back to the same spot he and Wopter were at. Brian had a "I'm scarred for life" look on his face.

Wopter: Oh hey Brian. So did it work?

Brian: *gulp* Yeah….the vibe is gone….you could say I…..puked it out….along with the grape soda I had 5 hours ago before our conversation.

Wopter:  Sacrifices had to be made man…………..still….I can't believe you thought mating season was a myth man.

Brian: You know Wop, this isn't making me feel any better one bit you know that?
Remember when Wopter said in that one pic of his "There's a moment in the year when the rabbits want... yeah you know :'D they call it "mating season" Well now its happened....and this time its on Brian. Brian's never had this feeling before and doesn't want the feeling at all XD Hope you enjoy the read =3 and poor Brian >_> but as they say "sacrifices must be made"

oh and BTW. if your wondering about what scene the pic is showing. Its this

[Suddenly, Brian's ears perked in the air. He started hunching up as if someone just kicked him in the crotch. He started doing strange movements.

Brian: ?! Mmmmm! Arrrrfggg!! Ffffffff!!!

Wopter: ? Uuuuh. You alright?]

Wopter: :iconwopter:
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ChaosWarriorKosaru's avatar
Kosaru: Wow, Brian... what you did took real courage, man!